Have you ever met anyone in your life who thinks, acts, behaves exactly as you do, who is having the same conditions as you have, who is exact replica of you?
You haven't...Am I right? Then why do you try to be like others? Why do you compare yourself with others? Why do you try to keep up with anyone?
See, the logic is simple ! Your DNA is different, you are different...and so is your destiny !!! Value that difference. Be what you are and do what you love. If someone else does something else, let him/her do it. You don’t need to do it only because someone else does it !
You are the only person who is and who will be responsible for your life! No one else! Its you who will be living your life ,not others! So, take your own decisions .Do only what you feel is right, what you feel is good and what will make you happy. Don’t simply follow anyone !
By this I don’t mean , not to listen to anyone or to stop following laws ! You must listen to others. But you should do only what you feel is correct according to you; not what is correct according to them !!!There are certain laws which are compulsory , for which we have no option .In such cases, we have to follow them ; But in most of the cases, we have a choice and in that cases remember to choose only what you feel is correct!!!
In the words of Steve Jobs ,
Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life.
Don't be trapped by dogma, which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice.
Have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary!!!
Showing posts with label My views..my philosophy... Show all posts
Showing posts with label My views..my philosophy... Show all posts
16 August, 2009
07 August, 2009
The greatest fear!!!
The fear of rejection may have haunted each one of us at one time or
another, It may be caused by our fear of being and living alone, too
much dependence on other people's perception of us, lack of confidence
and inability to control our own life.
Fear of rejection is a state of mind that makes a person feel inadequate,
helpless and worthless. It inhibits a person from doing or saying things
because of the fear that other people might not accept him or
disapprove of his actions and words.
A person who is so concerned about what others may think of him could
make his own life miserable because he can no longer speak his own
mind nor do things that he would normally do on his own. The fear of
rejection can paralyze a person and discourage him from being
productive.
A person's uniqueness disappears the moment he puts primary
emphasis on what others want him to be. A person too caught up with
pleasing others will start to emulate other people from the way they
dress and the way they behave in society.
This usually happens to young people who crave attention and
acceptance but do not yet have enough basis for self acceptance. This
is detrimental to a person's growth because there is no more room for
self expression, only of self denial and the thought of pleasing others.
A person who fears being rejected can be characterized as:
1. A person who acts without confidence - A person who is not sure of
himself will tend to imitate others and keep himself from trying new
things. Such lack of confidence will ultimately make such person
unhappy and bitter.
2. Keeps opinion to himself - A person who is not vocal about his
perception of things may be having trouble with rejection. He may keep
from voicing out his opinion for fear of being criticized.
3. Usually depressed - A person who does not have the freedom to
speak for himself and to express his wants will soon become depressed
and will no longer have a love for life. He will tend to act like a remotecontrol
robot that can not make his own decisions.
4. Confused about his true identity- A person who has fears of being
rejected will end up confused about who he really is. This will lead to an
identity crisis and will make him angry at himself and at other people for
no reason at all.
5. Lack of self esteem and self worth-A person who gives more
importance to what others may think of him does not have much faith in
himself to start with. This lack of self esteem may have resulted from
feelings of rejection instilled in him by his family or friends.
A person who fears rejection will ultimately be rejected by the people he
wants to please and who love him dearly. A person who has the
tendency to please other people will soon get sucked into a difficult
cycle of rejection. His behavior will keep the people he cares about
alienated from him. He sees this as a rejection and then the cycle goes
on and on!!!
another, It may be caused by our fear of being and living alone, too
much dependence on other people's perception of us, lack of confidence
and inability to control our own life.
Fear of rejection is a state of mind that makes a person feel inadequate,
helpless and worthless. It inhibits a person from doing or saying things
because of the fear that other people might not accept him or
disapprove of his actions and words.
A person who is so concerned about what others may think of him could
make his own life miserable because he can no longer speak his own
mind nor do things that he would normally do on his own. The fear of
rejection can paralyze a person and discourage him from being
productive.
A person's uniqueness disappears the moment he puts primary
emphasis on what others want him to be. A person too caught up with
pleasing others will start to emulate other people from the way they
dress and the way they behave in society.
This usually happens to young people who crave attention and
acceptance but do not yet have enough basis for self acceptance. This
is detrimental to a person's growth because there is no more room for
self expression, only of self denial and the thought of pleasing others.
A person who fears being rejected can be characterized as:
1. A person who acts without confidence - A person who is not sure of
himself will tend to imitate others and keep himself from trying new
things. Such lack of confidence will ultimately make such person
unhappy and bitter.
2. Keeps opinion to himself - A person who is not vocal about his
perception of things may be having trouble with rejection. He may keep
from voicing out his opinion for fear of being criticized.
3. Usually depressed - A person who does not have the freedom to
speak for himself and to express his wants will soon become depressed
and will no longer have a love for life. He will tend to act like a remotecontrol
robot that can not make his own decisions.
4. Confused about his true identity- A person who has fears of being
rejected will end up confused about who he really is. This will lead to an
identity crisis and will make him angry at himself and at other people for
no reason at all.
5. Lack of self esteem and self worth-A person who gives more
importance to what others may think of him does not have much faith in
himself to start with. This lack of self esteem may have resulted from
feelings of rejection instilled in him by his family or friends.
A person who fears rejection will ultimately be rejected by the people he
wants to please and who love him dearly. A person who has the
tendency to please other people will soon get sucked into a difficult
cycle of rejection. His behavior will keep the people he cares about
alienated from him. He sees this as a rejection and then the cycle goes
on and on!!!
21 July, 2009
How did Dale carnegie die?
Once I was discussing about books with my friend Pratik and during the talk I suggested him to read books by Dale Carnegie. He replied quickly, “What!!!Books by Dale Carnegie? Never . There is no use in reading those books. How can Dale Carnegie teach people to stop worrying when he himself committed suicide!” I didn’t pay much attention to what Pratik told and carried on reading the book.
The next day when another friend of mine ,Gaurang visited my room and saw the book , even he suggested me that I should not read the book because Dale Carnegie had himself committed suicide!
Finally,
‘How did dale Carnegie die?’
This is what I searched at google! And as usual I found some interesting links where there were long debates on how Dale Carnegie died ? Half of the people had the opinion that ‘The official biography from Dale Carnegie & Associates, Inc. states that he died of Hodgkin's disease on November 1, 1955 . So, it’s a rumor that he committed suicide.’ On the other hand half of them had the opinion that ‘Since the biography is from ‘Dale Carnegie & Associates, Inc.’ ,they don’t believe it and still think that he committed suicide.’
How he died is still a mystery .But more than it, what mystifies me is ‘What are people going to gain by knowing how he died ?Why should I or anybody stop reading his books even if he would have committed suicide ?’
Millions of people have been benefited by reading his book, including me! It hardly affects me whether he died because of disease or he committed suicide. The logic is simple. If you find the book useful, read it ! If you don’t find it useful ,don’t !!!
Different people will have different opinions .Many people like Mahatma Gandhi and there are still many people who don’t !!! So, why to form opinion about anyone on the basis of what others think about him /her?
No one is perfect. In every person, there are qualities which you will like and also the qualities which you won’t !So, if you think you can learn something good from that person ,learn it .Why to worry about anything else?
-Nikhil Daga
The next day when another friend of mine ,Gaurang visited my room and saw the book , even he suggested me that I should not read the book because Dale Carnegie had himself committed suicide!
Finally,
‘How did dale Carnegie die?’
This is what I searched at google! And as usual I found some interesting links where there were long debates on how Dale Carnegie died ? Half of the people had the opinion that ‘The official biography from Dale Carnegie & Associates, Inc. states that he died of Hodgkin's disease on November 1, 1955 . So, it’s a rumor that he committed suicide.’ On the other hand half of them had the opinion that ‘Since the biography is from ‘Dale Carnegie & Associates, Inc.’ ,they don’t believe it and still think that he committed suicide.’
How he died is still a mystery .But more than it, what mystifies me is ‘What are people going to gain by knowing how he died ?Why should I or anybody stop reading his books even if he would have committed suicide ?’
Millions of people have been benefited by reading his book, including me! It hardly affects me whether he died because of disease or he committed suicide. The logic is simple. If you find the book useful, read it ! If you don’t find it useful ,don’t !!!
Different people will have different opinions .Many people like Mahatma Gandhi and there are still many people who don’t !!! So, why to form opinion about anyone on the basis of what others think about him /her?
No one is perfect. In every person, there are qualities which you will like and also the qualities which you won’t !So, if you think you can learn something good from that person ,learn it .Why to worry about anything else?
-Nikhil Daga
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